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10/26/2003
Sunday,(i´m lazy),sunday.

Jæja,á er loksins komið að uppfærslu á þessari blessuðu síðu,hendi inn nokkrum bröndurum og svo set ég inn

myndir seinna í dag eða í kvöld,vonandi eigið þið bara eftir að njóta alls þess sem ég set inn :)

 

Reykingar eru mjög skaðlegar við þig og þá sem eru nálægt þér

Reyktu bara annarstaðar

Tóbaksreykur inniheldur bensen, nítrósamín, formaldehýð og blásýru

Ég veit ekkert hvað þessi efni eru eða hversu eitruð þau eru svo ég er ekkert að pæla í því

Fáðu hjálp við að hætta að reykja: sími 800 6030

Ég atla að hringja í þetta seinna og skrifa það sem er sagt vimmig :P

Ef þú hættir að reykja dregur það úr líkum á banvænum hjarta- og lungnasjúkdómum

Þú færð þá kort sem er þegar þú ert orðin gamall og krumpaður

Reykingar eru mjög ávanabindandi, byrjaðu ekki að reykja

Byrjaðu ekki að reykja stendur á pökkunum, dáldið of seint!

Reykingar Drepa

Betra að deyja þegar manni líður vel en þegar marr er orðinn gamall, krumpaður og getulaus :/

Reykingar geta valdir hægfara og kvalafullum dauða

Ef marr kvelst sona mikið útaf einhverjum sjúkdómi akkru bara ekki að stytta þjáningarnar og drepa sig sjálfur

Læknirinn þinn eða lyfjafræðingur geta hjálpað þér að hætta að reykja

Hvernig þá ???? fáðu þér nikotíntyggjo, það virkar ekki sjitt. Plásturinn, virkar ekki sjitt...

Reykingar á meðgöngu skaða barnið þitt

Slepptu því að vera ólétt!!! notaðu smokk!!!

 

 

 

Það var einusinni kona sem pantaði pizzu, á meðan pizzan var að koma fór hún í sturtu. Pizzu sendillinn kom á meðan hún var í sturtu, hún átti bara lítil handklæði og setti eitt yfir brjóstin á sér, hljóp fram og kíkti í kíkjugatið, en Pizzu sendillinn í bréfalúguna. Pizzasendillinn:

Hei krulli, er mamma þín heim?

 

 

Það voru tvö fóstur í maganum á mömmu sinni. annað spurði hitt: hei, hvort finnst þér skemmtilegri mamma eða pabbi? hitt svaraði öðru: mér finnst nú mamma skemmtilegri, við búum í henni. en hitt svaraði: já, mér finnst nú pabbi skemmtilegri, hann kemur svo oft í heimsókn :P

 

Did you hear about the two females who were watching a blonde walk by?

The first one said, "I wonder whether she's a natural blonde or a

bleached blonde."

Her friend said, "She's a suicide blonde."

The other said, "Suicide blonde? What's that?"

The friend said, "Dyed by her own hand!"

 

Never hold your farts in.................

Otherwise, they travel up your spine into your brain,

and that's where you get crappy ideas from!

Babe of the week


Weeklong geomagnetic storm alert issued
 

Mögnuð síða/Great webpage



 

 

 

 


Posted at 26.10.03 by gubbi56
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10/16/2003
Hand signals and some jokes:)

Hand signals!

 



Did you know that a man is made up of many useless
"things?" Here are a few examples...

He has an Adams apple that isn't an apple...
Two calves that will never become cows...
A nose bridge that doesn't lead anywhere...
A roof of the mouth that won't cover anything...
Twenty nails that won't hold a board...
A chest that won't hold linen...
Two tits that won't give milk...
Two buns that won't feed anyone...
A belly button that won't button...
Two balls that won't roll...
An ass that won't pull a plow...
An organ that won't play music...
A cock that won't crow...

What are YOU laughing about?!?
You've got a pussy that won't catch mice!!

 

Q. What is the difference between "ooooooh"and
"aaaaaaah"?
A. About three inches.

The following are the new Windows messages that are under consideration

for

the next version.

Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.

Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.

Press any key to continue, or any other key to quit.

Press any key except ... no, No, NO, NOT THAT ONE!

Press Ctrl-Alt-Del now for IQ test.

Close your eyes and press escape three times.

Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.

This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game?

Windows message: "Error saving file! Format drive now? (Y/Y)"

This is a message from God Gates: "Rebooting the world. Please log off."

To "shut down" your system, type "WIN."

BREAKFAST.SYS halted ... Cereal port not responding.

COFFEE.SYS missing ... Insert cup in cup holder and press any key.

CONGRESS.SYS corrupted ... Re-boot Washington D.C? (Y/N)

File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

Bad or missing mouse. Spank the cat? (Y/N)

Runtime Error 6D at 417A:32CF: Incompetent User.

Error reading FAT record: Try the SKINNY one? (Y/N)

WinErr 16547: LPT1 not found. Use backup. (PENCIL & PAPER.SYS)

User Error: Replace user.

Windows VirusScan 1.0 - Windows found: Remove it? (Y/N)

Welcome to Microsoft's World -- Your Mortgage is Past Due.

Your hard drive has been scanned and all stolen software titles have

been deleted. The police are on the way.



Posted at 16.10.03 by gubbi56
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10/14/2003
Strange


     === Awesome Factoid ===

A man´s penis not only shrinks during cold weather but also from
nonsexual excitement like when his favorite football team scores
a touchdown, etc.

     === Awesome Factoid ===

The word avocado comes from the Spanish word aguacate
which is derived from the Aztec word ahuacati
which means testicle.


     === Awesome Factoid ===

In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, it´s against the law to have sex with a truck driver in a toll booth.
(I can see women all over Pennsylvania questioning their reason to go on right about now!)

 

     === Awesome Factoid ===

Oneirogmophobia is the fear of wet dreams.


 


 

 === Awesome Factoid ===

A bull can inseminate 300 cows from one single ejaculation.
(That's a lot of Bull!)


===  Factoid ===

98% of houses in the United States have at least one television set.

 


What's the difference between a whore and a rooster?
.
..
...
....
A rooster says cock-a-doodle-doo and a whore says any-cock'll-do.


What's the speed limit of sex?
.
..
...
....
68.  At 69 you have to turn around.


 


 

 === Awesome Factoid ===

During the 1920s, it was believed that jazz music caused one to permanately lose his sexual inhibitions.
It was often banned in many cities. One private company went as far as to sell the elites "jazz proof" furniture.


The time in Reykjavik,Iceland
 


Posted at 14.10.03 by gubbi56
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10/10/2003
Ah yes,i do remember.....

Sluts? you´ll judge!


 


She´s very hot


Posted at 10.10.03 by gubbi56
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10/4/2003
Stórleikur í dag

Arsenal-Liverpool

Jæja,þá er þessi stórleikur  klukkan 11.15 í dag,svo sannarlega vona ég að þetta fokkings lið Arsenal tapi fyrir Liverpool eða bara geri jafntefli,því að Man.Utd á eftir að vinna Birmingham á sunnudaginn.

Lengi lifi Manchester United.

And as you see why I love soccer.

The soccergirl

 Oldie but goodie :)

 


Posted at 4.10.03 by gubbi56
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Saturday

Another babe of the week..!


  BABE OF THE MONTH:

Babe of the month
This is a nice woman I see...

Icewolf69


Posted at 4.10.03 by gubbi56
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10/2/2003
In George Washington's days........

In George Washington's days, there were no cameras. One's image

was either sculpted or painted. Some paintings of George

Washington showed him standing behind a desk with one arm behind his

back

while others showed bothlegs and both arms. Prices charged by

painters were

not based on how many people were to be painted, but by how many

limbs were

to be painted. Arms and legs are "limbs" therefore painting them

would cost

the buyer more. Hence the expression "Okay, but it'll cost you an arm

and a leg."

***************************************************

As incredible as it sounds, men and women took baths only twice a

year! May

and October). Women kept their hair covered, while men shaved their

heads

(because of lice and bugs) and wore wigs. Wealthy

men could afford good wigs made from wool. The wigs couldn't be

washed so to

clean them, they could carve out a loaf of bread, put the wig in the

shell

and bake it for 30 minutes. The heat would make the wig big and

fluffy,

hence the term "big wig." Today we often use the term "here comes

the Big

Wig" because someone appears to be or is powerful and wealthy.

***************************************************

In the late 1700s many houses consisted of a large room with only one

chair.

Commonly, a long wide board was folded down from the wall and used for

dining. The "head of the household" always sat in the chair while

everyone

else ate sitting on the floor. Once in a while an invited guest would

be

offered to sit in this chair during a meal (who was almost always a

man). To

sit in the chair meant you were important and in charge. Sitting in

the

chair, one was called the "chair man." Today in business we use the

expression/title "Chairman or Chairman of the Board"

***************************************************

Needless to say, personal hygiene left much room for improvement. As a

result, many women and men had developed acne scars by adulthood. The

women

would spread bee's wax over their facial skin to smooth out their

complexions. When they were speaking to each other, if a woman began

to

stare at another woman's face she was told "mind your own bee's wax."

Should

the woman smile, the wax would crack, hence the term "crack a smile."

Also,

when they sat too close to the fire, the wax would melt and therefore

the

expression "losing face."

***************************************************

Ladies wore corsets which would lace up in the front. A tightly

tied lace was worn by a proper and dignified lady as in "straight

laced."

***************************************************

Common entertainment included playing cards. However, there was a tax

levied

when purchasing playing cards but only applicable to the "ace of

spades." To

avoid paying the tax, people would purchase 51 cards

instead. Yet, since most games require 52 cards, these people were

thought

to be stupid or dumb because they weren't "playing with a full deck."

***************************************************

Early politicians required feedback from the public to determine What

was

considered important to the people. Since there were no

telephones, tv or radios, the politicians sent their assistants to

local

taverns, pubs and bars who were told to "go sip some ale" and listen

to

people's conversations and political concerns. Many assistants were

dispatched at different times. "You go sip here" and "You go sip

there.."

The two words "go sip" were eventually combined when referring to the

local

opinion and thus, we have the term "gossip."

***************************************************

At local taverns, pubs and bars, people drank from pint and

quart sized containers. A bar maid's job was to keep an eye on the

customers

and keep the drinks coming. She had to pay close attention and

remember who

was drinking in "pints" and who was drinking in "quarts." Hence the

term

"minding your "'P's and Q's."

So now you know.....


Posted at 2.10.03 by gubbi56
Comments (2)

Gun Control

a. An armed man is a citizen. An unarmed man is a subject.

b. A gun in the hand is better than a cop on the phone.

c. Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface.

d. Gun control is not about guns; it's about control.

e. If guns are outlawed, can we use swords?

f. If guns cause crime, then pencils cause misspelled words.

g. Free men do not ask permission to bear arms.

h. If you don't know your rights you don't have any.

i. Those who trade liberty for security have neither.

j. The United States Constitution 1791. All Rights Reserved.

k. What part of "shall not be infringed" do you not understand ?

l. The Second Amendment is in place in case they ignore the others.

m. 64,999,987 firearms owners killed no one yesterday.

n. Guns only have two enemies: Rust and Politicians.

o. Know guns, know peace and safety.

No guns, no peace nor safety.

p. You don't shoot to kill; you shoot to stay alive.

q. 911 - government sponsored Dial a Prayer.

r. Assault is a behavior, not a device.

s. Criminals do love gun control - it makes their jobs safer.

t. If Guns cause Crime, then Matches cause Arson.

u. Only a government that is afraid of its citizens tries to control

them.

v. You only have the rights you are willing to fight for.

w. Enforce the "gun control laws" we have, don't make more.

x. When you remove the people's right to bear arms, you create slaves.

y. The American Revolution would never have happened with Gun Control.

z. Pass it on.


Posted at 2.10.03 by gubbi56
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The Astonishing Similarities between These Two Men

The Astonishing Similarities between These Two Men
(And Some of the Differences)

Two men born on different continents, in greatly different circumstances, following utterly divergent paths, or so it might seem. And yet, although one was destined for obscurity and the other for infamy, there are strange, disturbing, almost supernatural parallels in their lives. Coincidence? Rod Serling? Who can say?


Similarities

 

Birth

 

 

Both men were born in the 1940s!

 

 

Education

 

 

Both men have a Bachelor's degree and a Master's degree!
(David actually earned his degrees, however.)

 

 

Marriage

 

 

Each man has been married to just one woman!
(There are no gaps in David's record, so we know this is true in his case.)

 

 

War

 

 

Both men avoided service in Viet Nam!
(Although David was almost drafted.)

 

 

Women

 

 

Each man is married to a woman whose first name begins with L!

 

Athaledics

 

 

Both men exercise!
Neither man is a real jock!
(But one of them pretends to be.)

 

 

Cowboys

 

 

Neither man is or has ever been a cowboy!
(Although both have worn cowboy boots occasionally and, well, you know, pretended.)
(But David did his cowboy pretending when he was a little boy.)

 

 

Texas

 

 

Both men have lived in Texas!
Neither was born there!

 

 

Horses

 

 

Neither man can ride a horse!
Both men stay away from them!

 

 

Chills & Thrills

 

 

Both men get the shivers at the phrase "Homeland Security"!
(Different type of shiver, though.)

 

 

Bravery

 

 

Both men are physical cowards!
(But David admits it readily and cheerfully. And on September 11, he went to work.)

 

 

Spiritual Matters

 

 

Both men drink alcohol!
(David tends to drink a bit more whenever he hears Dubya referred to as President Bush.)

 

 

Languages

 

 

Neither man speaks Spanish!
(But David doesn't pretend that he can.)

 

 

Golden Age

 

 

Both men know that the Clinton presidency was the country's longest and most profound sustained era of growing optimism, wealth, opportunity, and hope! Even the poor were getting a bit richer! Various previously excluded groups were entering the political process! The sinister hold of religion over the minds of Americans was diminishing! Fat cats were growing uneasy!
(One of the two men felt that all of that had to be stopped.)

 

 

Politics

 

 

Neither man was ever elected President of the United States!

 

 

More Politics

 

 

Both men know who was elected President of the United States in November 2000!


Posted at 2.10.03 by gubbi56
Comments (2)

David Letterman´s top 10

Top Ten Questions Received by the Schwarzenegger For Governor!

10. "What's Arnold's poorly-worded plan to fix the economy?"

9. "Why is Arnold campaigning in St. Louis?"

8. "Will he govern shirtless?"

7. "Is he going to take a leave of absence if he becomes pregnant again?"

6. "Just to clarify -- will he be back?"

5. "When is this Governor movie coming out?"

4. "Did Arnold get the egg I tossed to him?"

3. "Is this the Tom Arnold for Governor hotline?"

2. "Can you tell Mr. Schwarzenegger his steroid shipment has arrived?"

1. "What time is tonight's group sex fundraiser?


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A babe!

Babe


Fat ass taking a nap.....


Posted at 2.10.03 by gubbi56
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